Financial emergency brings one couple closer together

A financial crisis like a job loss can put enormous stress on a marriage and a family. But it can also bring deeper problems to the surface that can turn it into a blessing in disguise.

For instance, Sara and Tom always considered themselves a typical American family when it came to their household finances. They each worked full-time, carried some credit card debt, and generally lived within their means.

But in the back of her mind, Sara knew something wasn’t right. Whenever she sat down to pay the bills, she felt a sense of fear and insecurity. “We’ve always been okay financially. We didn’t overspend and we are not extravagant people, but we didn’t have an emergency fund,” she said.

In a financial bind
Like many people, Sara and Tom [I’ve changed their names to respect their privacy] felt there was no reason to expect a financial crisis. They both have good jobs—Tom is in the New Jersey state government, Sara is a sixth-grade science teacher—where they’ve worked for more than 20 years. But in the spring of 2004 Tom had to stop working due to a serious illness, putting the family in a bind.

“We needed to learn how to live on one salary when we were just doing okay on two salaries. We didn’t know how we were going to do it,” Sara said.

I met Sara and Tom through Good $ense, a financial counseling ministry I serve with through our church. While a crisis had prompted them to seek counseling, it was evident that Sara and Tom often were not on the same page financially. Sara is more of a saver, Tom more of a spender. Money was often a source of conflict in their marriage.

Accountable to their budget
As their counselor, I helped Sara and Tom examine their income, assets, and spending patterns. They learned how to create a spending plan for their family each month, something they had never been able to do before. Each time we met, they stayed accountable as to how well each was sticking to the plan. As they began to monitor their budget and plan together how to pay their bills with less income, the stress and conflict caused by the money problems subsided.

“[The counseling] put us on the right track,” said Tom. Sara agreed, “It helped me to feel secure and safe when everything felt out of control.”

A catalyst for positive change
Thankfully, Tom has since recovered from his illness and is working again. Though the emergency is over, the lessons on budgeting and getting on the same financial page have stuck with them. A crisis turned into a catalyst for positive change in their marriage and financial life.

“The funny thing is, we were more financially together during that time of our lives than ever before,” Tom said.

My daughter's millionaire dreams aren't far from reality

Our oldest daughter Jessica said she wants to be a millionaire someday. At age 19, she’s off to a good start, and that substantially increases the odds of achieving her goal.

A few weeks ago, Jess took about $1,600 she’d saved from after-school jobs and opened a Roth IRA. With a Roth IRA, Jess can save and invest for her future, such as retirement. The money she puts in will grow without being taxed, just like a traditional IRA or a 401(k) plan. However, unlike those types of retirement savings vehicles, when she starts taking money out of the Roth IRA down the road, her earnings likely will be tax-free.

$100 a month to start
Naturally Jess isn’t thinking as much right now about retiring from her career as starting it. She’s in her second year at Northeastern University in Boston, majoring in journalism and cinema studies. Part of her education includes a semester working full-time at a local newspaper, so she’s been getting a weekly paycheck since January. Her plan is to put at least $100 a month into her Roth account for the foreseeable future, and beyond.

No school debt and lots of time
Jessica’s opportunity to build substantial wealth is enormous thanks to two huge advantages she has. First, she attends Northeastern on a full scholarship. She will graduate in a few years with no school debt whatsoever, which should help to keep her plans to save on track even while pursuing a career field where starting salaries often almost feel like minimum wage.

The second advantage is time. With a savings horizon of 40-plus years, Jess’ sacrifices of trendy clothes, late-night pizzas, and morning ice coffees in these college years could mean financial freedom and security in her retirement years. I’d bet some Baby Boomers today wish they had made the same decisions when they were her age.

It sure adds up
Not that Jess needs any motivation, but I e-mailed her these numbers to show just how wise she really is to start a meaningful saving plan at age 19:

(For simplicity, I based my calculations on a 10% average annual return on the IRA investments.)

• By saving just $100 a month in a Roth IRA, Jess stands an excellent chance of being a millionaire by the time she is 63 years old.


• If she increased her savings to $168 a month, she has a great likelihood of being a millionaire by her 60th birthday.


• If she starts saving the maximum amount allowed for an IRA ($4,000/year in 2007, or $333/month), she could even have her first million by the time she turns 52 (not even “retirement” age).

Granted, $1 million in 2047 won’t get Jessica a retirement that is 100% financially secure. But unlike many kids her age, she already understands the value of saving and sacrifice to reach a long-term financial goal, and that will serve her well.

I couldn’t be prouder.